Tag Archives: Bush

Giving money and power to the government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. And this one time I’d rather give it to the lawyers. Who cares if they kill themselves? It’s time to start suing the Feds, State and local…

I was reading an editorial in a Philadelphia newspaper the other day that was absolutely bodacious. If not audacious! A few short years ago this would have been considered mendacious… Hell…downright heresy! The Daily News was blatantly suggesting that we … Continue reading

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We all lie. Not just Lance or Te’o or Bush or Clinton… We lie because it beats the alternative… It’s never going to stop. Never!.. And then there is the troubled soul in the apartment below. He killed his cat and then came after me… Hmm… He definitely wasn’t lying…

The tall man from whom I rent his top floor has a big belly and small feet. So, it is common knowledge that he often has trouble keeping his balance – ‘mentally’ in particular. And there Pete was the other … Continue reading

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This is not the time to talk of gun control! About the same day as Newtown, school children were slashed in China; drones killed women in Pakistan, Children were abducted in Africa…If the Palestinians gave up their guns there would be no more war; if the Israelis did, there would be no more Israel…Teachers should have guns, too…

My congenitally ill younger son has been on the fast track to die. And after years of battling a stormy sea too deep, being swept further away from the foggy shores of medical miracles, my wife finally stole his challenged … Continue reading

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Why is it always easier to fix the blame rather than the problem? Like with the Doctor, the Nurse and the pending doom of December 21st… Sometimes stuff just happens… Is there anything you can do about the weather?…

I guess I have to blame my long dead bourbon sippin’ pappy for that great sex life I can only remember. Between those omnipotent puffs on his omniscient corn cob pipe he both excoriated and exhorted me. He growled that … Continue reading

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I move so fast that when I turn out the lights I am in bed before the room gets dark. Contrary to a popular bumper sticker: Speed don’t kill. Only stupidity… And then there was the man who fell to earth faster than the speed of sound…

A few of the times I jumped out of a perfectly good airplane I thought it would help speed me to wherever I was going in record time. And isn’t that just like America: We’re a country that doesn’t know … Continue reading

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Most folks live to have resumès, instead of having resumès because they lived…Most resumès ain’t nothing but lies that nobody bothers to read anymore — and not just because there ain’t no jobs…And then along came not-quite-5-year-old Andrew who asked me to help write his resumè…Oy-vey-iz-mir!

I think on my resumè, which I have never finished nor submitted anywhere, it still says that I can juggle while driving my ex-wives mad; am working on a cure for mental halitosis and teenagers; am totally politically-incorrect and a … Continue reading

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From the recent conventions you must agree that Republicans have nothing but bad ideas. And the Democrats have no ideas. Indeed, democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half of the time. And I’ve come to believe the only difference between Republicans and Democrats is Democrats allow the poor to be corrupt, too…

I have a confession. I have been a Republican – at least in my lustful heart — since birth. But in truth, I have never found a Republican to vote for. It’s not that I don’t trust them. I trust … Continue reading

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