Tag Archives: Clinton

If a man watches 3 football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. The reason women don’t play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public. No one in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein. And meanwhile, I am having a breakdown…

I am not absolutely certain, but I think I am having another breakdown… which I am sure doesn’t come as a surprise to any of my exes. Undoubtedly, they figure I broke down years back – especially after I tied … Continue reading

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I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence and insanity to anyone, but it sure works for me. And with this Presidential election the risk of a wrong decision is preferable to the terror of indecision. I have my serious doubts about The Donald. But I seriously doubt I could ever vote for Hillary…

Having spent many of my formative years in my grandmother’s ‘brothel’ I thought I had seen or heard just about everything a mouth could do. Obviously that was before I saw and heard the ‘doings’ from the mouths of Hillary … Continue reading

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Since we already know that everybody lies, why do journalists risk their lives to tell us what we already know? Because that’s what we do. And we’d do it even if we weren’t getting paid to tell you that you are stoopid, ignorant and foolish. Because it is so much fun, even after the deadline…

The question being shrilly postured and posed today in the horrendous wake of yet two more journalists being beheaded is: Why do reporters take such risks? And I have a simple answer: Because everybody lies. Everybody. It is almost failsafe … Continue reading

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Putin ain’t mean, he’s just primitive…like the rest of us. But don’t you ever wonder how he and is oligarchy — like our once poor boys who went to Washington — got so damn rich? Hmm… inquiring minds would like to know…

After the last scream… and gunshot… and battle cry… the dust had settled back down, covering the plants and leaves, and the gaping eyes of the dead bodies strewn all about. Nehemiah helped me slowly up on my wobbly legs … Continue reading

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We all lie. Not just Lance or Te’o or Bush or Clinton… We lie because it beats the alternative… It’s never going to stop. Never!.. And then there is the troubled soul in the apartment below. He killed his cat and then came after me… Hmm… He definitely wasn’t lying…

The tall man from whom I rent his top floor has a big belly and small feet. So, it is common knowledge that he often has trouble keeping his balance – ‘mentally’ in particular. And there Pete was the other … Continue reading

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When authorities warn of the sinfulness of sex, the lesson to be learned is: Do not have sex with the authorities. When a doctor calls you sexist for complimenting her stiletto boots the lesson is: a man’s gotta get back to being a man.

She’s a very attractive skin doctor who dresses tastefully expensive. And when she walked into the coffee shop the other day it wasn’t her M.D. degree in dermatology that popped your eyeballs inside out. It was her four-inch-high, needle-thin stiletto … Continue reading

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My brother knew how to rescue me from a far too long hospital stay. President Obama, too, must learn how to twist arms, break bones and take compromising photos. Politics is no game for a gentleman…

It wasn’t the first time. And it definitely wasn’t the last time. But it was one of those times that my wife tried to kill me. This time I ended up in the hospital for a rather extended time. I … Continue reading

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