Tag Archives: drink

Everything that goes up must come down. But there comes a time when not everything that’s down can come up… for that we’ve got Viagra. Which proves some laws are not made by nature – but by man. So why doesn’t the price of coffee and cigars ever come down?…

Hmm… Last Sunday I made a discovery: That the price of coffee has nothing to do with the laws of physics. And neither does the price of a cigar – premium or not. That doesn’t make me a genius. However, … Continue reading

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If you think you want to live forever, try spending a night with my ex-wife. Otherwise, listen to my Mother: Without your health, it all gets too humiliating…

The other night on the phone I teased my 91-year-old mother that she was going to live forever… And so far so good, eh? I could practically hear my mother calculating through her rich, long-ago- premature, silver hair. Finally she … Continue reading

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Man may have used his intelligence to invent stupidity, but his body’s natural evolutionary instincts keep him alive in spite of himself. Let’s start with deep water….

My father built the fire pond after his chain saw factory burned down when the fire trucks ran out of water. But he told my mother, a wonderful swimmer, that he built it for her — because she looked like … Continue reading

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