Tag Archives: Einstein

If a man watches 3 football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. The reason women don’t play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public. No one in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein. And meanwhile, I am having a breakdown…

I am not absolutely certain, but I think I am having another breakdown… which I am sure doesn’t come as a surprise to any of my exes. Undoubtedly, they figure I broke down years back – especially after I tied … Continue reading

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I have a confession: I am not politically correct. Don’t even wanna be. Being PC means always having to say you are sorry. And these days people only listen to what they want to hear. So hear this: I am mad as hell and don’t wanna take it no more!

I used to date a woman a couple years back who I boldly informed from the outset: ‘If you wanna have a good time and lots of laughs, stick with me. If you wanna get serious, go back to your … Continue reading

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It’s better to be Jewish than gay because when you’re Jewish you don’t have to tell your mother. Racism is so stupid when there are so many more reasons to dislike people on an individual basis. Hmm… I thought racism was when you hated ‘others’ more than you are supposed to…

I must be a racist — even if the word racist is like ketchup these days. It can be put on practically anything. Heck, as that leggy, blonde neo-con once wrote: If only Al Sharpton were around, Lincoln would have … Continue reading

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It seems like most everyone, everywhere is lying these days. They only tell the truth when there is more profit in it. But if you throw the crap back in their face they learn there are consequences. Everyone, that is, except my ex-Stephanie…

The death notice in a local Ohio newspaper included a simple last request by the deceased, Scott Entsminger. The avid Cleveland Browns fan, sought that his beloved NFL team provide six pall bearers to carry him to his grave — … Continue reading

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The kid asked: How old is G-d? Some said to Google it. And I wanted to spank them black and bruised. So, listen up: Data ain’t information. Info ain’t knowledge. Knowledge ain’t understanding. Understanding ain’t wisdom… And may G-d grant me the serenity to recognize the difference…

At a party the other afternoon at a friend’s big stone house in an arriviste Philadelphia suburb, one of the impudent tykes, with an overstuffed mouth, popped an imposing question. The dour youth — undoubtedly a future Wall Street ‘perp’ … Continue reading

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To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all. Which is much the same for our country and its taxes. If you understood them you’d be certifiable… Look at Congress…

I used to tell one or two of my exes that if she could make ‘me’ understand whatever she was ‘simply’ trying to tell me, then even our five-year-old would be able to understand her. At least there would be … Continue reading

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Promises are made to be broken…The only thing a man can both give and keep is his word. His word is his truth, his honor…his everything… The first casualty of any war is truth… After that it is all madness… Elections are war…

Folks who don’t know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign. Elections are supposedly when people find out what politicians stand for. But it is more likely when politicians find out what people … Continue reading

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