Tag Archives: lesbian

Imagination was given to man to compensate for what he is not; a sense of humor to console him for what he is. We don’t lose our sense of humor because we get old. We get old because we lose our sense of humor. The problem with humor is often that people you use it on aren’t in a very good mood. And Joey G was cute when he was being humorless…

The skinny guy was about two feet from the top of climbing the 30-foot greased pole. He was part of a team of other skinny guys with tattoos, climbing over each other, groping and hoping to get to the prizes … Continue reading

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Sometimes I want to go back in time and punch myself in the face. Men are only born ignorant, but work overtime on staying stupid. We seem to forget that a woman may born you… love you… and mourn you… But a woman is a sometime thing. And sometime between that woman and dawn, I lost my memory… and my bike…

Whenever someone tells me to do something – even have a nice day – I often respond: ‘Hmm… I’ve been married. I know how to follow orders.’ But not very well, apparently, since from time to time I’ve been in … Continue reading

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There are two things people want more than sex and money — recognition and praise. That’s why everybody’s running for President. However, if you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughed, was it a joke? And that’s why I’m voting for the Donald…

During the last few days I was reading some newspaper stories that reminded me that life is pretty funny when you realize how absurd it can be. Like, about the guy from Pennsylvania seeking to have sex with a horse … Continue reading

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If you’re playing a poker game and can’t tell who the sucker is around the table — it’s you. Gambling promises the poor what property performs for the rich – something for nothing. And Atlantic City is like a crab, crawling backward in search of the ocean… and missing! And now back to being Gay…

One night under the low lights of a noisy tavern this young, vivacious woman with laughing eyes from Texas was explaining how she had logically, strategically and mathematically determined to move from Dallas to Philadelphia. That is instead of some … Continue reading

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I am not politically correct. And never intend to be. I am for speaking up. But as I often admonished my kids: If you’re talking, you ain’t listening. If you ain’t listening, you ain’t learning. And if you ain’t learning there can never be any peace… So don’t peee-cccssee me off!…

Apparently Frank is in need of a mental enema. At a recent reunion of venerable old friends Frank, who’s once cerebral refrains roared from beneath his once-thick-mane, has apparently gotten as clogged-up as his jowls and bowels. He started howling … Continue reading

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Will someone please inform the LGBT that not everyone in the world is either Gay or anti-Gay! Hey, I was once a man trapped in a woman’s body. Of course, that was before I was born…But please: Don’t touch my heroes – even in the funny pages…Or I-ah-break-ah-your-ah-face-ah….

Unequivocally…I would like to state here and now that some of my ‘best’ friends aren’t (ARE NOT!) Gay, Black, Alien, Handicapped, Women, Transgendered, White, Honky, Cracker, Puerto Rican, Asian, Russian, European, Indian, Latino, Mexican, Eskimo, Arab, Jewish, Catholic… or even … Continue reading

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Some folks like to insist there are only steers and queers in Texas. And you don’t look like no steer. Well, no doubt from G-d’s far away aerie we all look more than a little queer — whether we are single, married or divorced…Odd as that may seem to some folks…even if you’re asexual…

As a divorced father recently wailed: Gay people should definitely be allowed to get married. Just because somebody’s gay doesn’t mean he shouldn’t suffer like the rest of us. Now that’s what I’m talkin’ ‘bout! But for some reason we … Continue reading

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