Tag Archives: lottery

Democracy is the process where we choose the person who will get the blame…like Snowden. And I blame my Big Mama for my poor sex life. All she told me is that the man goes on top and the woman goes underneath. For years a future ex-wife and I slept in bunk beds…

So, who can I blame for having so many exes? I guess I should have learned more from watching the farm animals, as well as listening to Edward Snowden. Hmm…. Anyway, blame is for G-d and small children. After all, … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Oh, you hate your job? There’s a support group for that. It’s called everybody, and they meet at the bar…Yet, if you do a half-assed job, you’re a one-eyed man in a kingdom of the blind, dumb, stoopid and unhappy…Learn from successes, for if you learn only from mistakes, you learn only errors…

After spending nearly three months attempting to lasso a copy of my birth certificate, the department of records finally sent me – after political intervention — two copies. However, both possessed the absolutely wrong month and day. And all my … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

You may be a redneck if… you’ve spent more on your pickup truck than on your education. The function of education is to teach one to think intensively and critically. Intelligence plus character is its goal. Hmm… Ghana is undergoing an education revolution — and I’m going to investigate…

  As school bells bellow another academic year I want to share some sage counsel a rock and roll star once conveyed: If you wanna get laid, kid, go to school, especially college. But if you wanna get an education, … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

A guy wins the $338 million Power Ball, but ends up with only 45 percent of the pot…Indeed, that’s a government hallucination – like a beautiful woman at 2AM turning out to be a transvestite with too much man-handle… Illusion is the first of all pleasures, but disillusionment heralds enlightenment…

Maybe it was that guy in New Jersey recently winning the $338 million Power Ball lottery — but then only receiving 45%, or $152 million, in the payout. That is, after the government and the state took their alligator bites, … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment