Monthly Archives: May 2013

In a world of racism, sexism, anti-Semitism and all hateful things, what inevitably seems to conquer all is…horniness. It ain’t happening in church. The most segregated time in America is the weekly hour of worship – to the very same Lord who made us all, great and small…

The first time I ‘slept’ (Slept? Who had time to sleep?!) with this woman in West Africa’s Ivory Coast  she turned to me and wondered in those scrumptious, breathy, French half-tones: “Am I your first black woman?” I smiled devilishly … Continue reading

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Our crooks are elected by the vast majority who don’t vote. We have closed our eyes to the public corruption of our democracy. We don’t need more laws! We need less stoopid people to see that corruption is nature’s way of restoring our faith in democracy…

“You can’t blame Eve,” exhaled my dear ol’ bourbon sippin’ Pappy between one of those omnipotent puffs on his omniscient corncob pipes. “She may have made man weak between the knees. But it was G-d who made man stoopid between … Continue reading

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G-d couldn’t be everywhere, so he made mothers…My mother has had a great deal of trouble with me. I think she’s enjoyed it even though she barks that having me as a son makes her wish she could go back to being a virgin…

My 92-year-old Mama was earnestly informing me the other day that she never had morning sickness until after I was born. This is the very same Big Mama who regularly dismisses my simple-minded humor as insensitive, tactless and downright ludicrous. … Continue reading

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