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- I am not here to grieve Larry’s death, but to thank G-d that such a man lived. Indeed, the timing of his demise, like the ending of a story, gives a changed meaning to what preceded it. And obviously, true wisdom comes to each of us when we realize how little we understand about life, ourselves and the world around us…
- Children begin by loving their parents; then they judge them; rarely, do they forgive them. But blame is for G-d and the small children we must keep from going insane. Leanne discovered she couldn’t have them. And I had married into insanity. Indeed, mothers may be fonder than fathers of their children because they are more certain they are their own…
- Imagination was given to man to compensate for what he is not; a sense of humor to console him for what he is. We don’t lose our sense of humor because we get old. We get old because we lose our sense of humor. The problem with humor is often that people you use it on aren’t in a very good mood. And Joey G was cute when he was being humorless…
- Just as there are doctors who help people who have done bad things, there are lawyers who defend bad people. People do not win fights, lawyers do. Everyone thinks defense lawyers must believe their clients are innocent, but that’s seldom true. Most of the time they are guilty as O.J… yet Trev also got his client off — mostly…
- Mother’s Day can be a torment, especially if your mother’s been dead less than a year… Men are what their mothers made them. And my mother was slightly insane. She told us baked potato skins were bad for us – so she could devour ours. Hmm… I write a mental letter to my mother every day… and apparently so does my brother…
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Tag Archives: entitlement
Tipping makes no sense: Why do we tip Pierre $20 for bringing a $100 steak at night, but only tip Gertrude $2 for delivering a $10 plate of eggs in the morning? They’re performing the same services, aren’t they?
I never really mind bad service in a restaurant. It makes me feel much better about not leaving a tip. I know I am standing in a long viral line to spew some angst here, but I do have issues … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged alimony, America, Australia, Boeing, bourbon, butlers, Capitol Hill, CDC, chandeliers, Charlie Sheen, cockroaches, crawfish, Donald Trump, donations, Electrolux, entitlement, Geneeral motors, gratuity, Hollywood, Jane, jazz, Keystone State, Latino, lawyers, lobsters, machete, mormons, Mother Theresa, New York City, Pabst, penal colonyetiquettekdoorman, Pennsylvania, power-of-attorney, prostitute, salsa, South America, State House, State Liquor Stores, tariff, Tarzan, tipping, tithes, tradition, union, United Fund, vacuum, Versailles, waiters, Wall Street, welfare, workers
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I can’t help myself: I am cursing. I am stoned. I am armed. And I am heading off to Washington. And no one can stop me because I am perfectly legal
What I want to obtain from my doctor is a written medical opinion which stipulates I have been diagnosed with Tourette’s Syndrome. Therefore, under the American Disability Act, I simply can’t help myself — for cursing. At everything. At anytime. … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged abortion, American Disability Act, arrested, bastards, beer bellies, bible, Boehner, bourbon, cash, communication, congressmen, corkscrew, cursing, death, Democrats, devil, divorce, doctor's opinion, education, entitlement, epileptic, fatal, fatal disease, Grand Mal, healthcare, heart, Helen Keller, hell, Hollywood, hope, incest, interests, jungle gym, limelight, loopholes, machete, marijuana, Medicaid, medical marijuana, medical opinion, Medicare, mullah, nail, national debt, neighbor's wife, noise, office, orangutan, pappy, penalized, Pennsylvania Avenue, permit, pipe, pistol, politician, politicians, popcorn, potentates, prescription, priest, promises, Reagan, Republicans, river, scorpion, seizure, senator, starter pistol, statesman, stoned, sued, tattooed, tattooes, think, Tourettes, Tourettes Syndrome, turtle, TV, union, Washington, WeeklyReaders, wife
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